In Memoriam: Heather J. McKee
by The Family | Jan 11, 2025
Heather Joan McKee passed away on January 9, 2025 following an 18-month journey (not battle) with esophageal cancer.
Matt, Heather, and Piper McKee
The daughter and eldest child of Reuel and Joan McKee, Heather spent most of her childhood growing up in Charlotte, where she attended Charlotte County Day School. She graduated from Davidson in 1987 with a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology. At Davidson, she deftly balanced academics and athletics as a remarkable scholar-athlete. She is Davidson’s only known four-sport intercollegiate female athlete. This is made even more remarkable based on her level of play in multiple sports, and all of it following an ACL tear in high school that would have been career-ending for most.
And yes, at 5’10” – she played center for the Davidson Wildcats.
Recruited for basketball and field hockey at bigger schools like Carolina, she chose Davidson for the academics and the ability to play multiple sports. She still holds the single game scoring record for the Davidson Women’s Basketball team – with 35 points in a game. Her record has been tied, but the important distinction is that she was the only athlete to score 35 before the 3-point era. She served as the captain of the team her junior year; it was the year that the program was cut from the line up of Davidson’s intercollegiate sports. Despite a much-heralded winning season, she had the difficult task of telling her teammates that their program had been cut.
The cover of the DCFH recruiting pamphlet.
She was the sweeper on the Davidson Field Hockey team and was named All Conference All Decade for the 1980s. She also was invited to the 1984 Olympic Team tryouts. When she didn’t make the team, she was asked to fly cross country from Los Angeles to Florida to play on the U.S. Junior Olympic team since she was only 18 years old. She was a four-year letter winner and a two-year captain of the team.
Heather’s third sport was track and field. In the 1980s, there wasn’t a big recruiting effort for the team, and so it was routine for the coaches to recruit from other teams when there weren’t schedule conflicts. Unlike some of those other unexpected dual-sport athletes, Heather also performed at a superior level in when asked to throw the shot put. She set the school record on her first official throw, won the Davidson Relays, and held the college record for six years. It was a record that was only bested when another scholar-athlete named Heather arrived on the Davidson campus having thrown shot put in high school.
Thankfully, Heather’s Mom Joan even documented her shot put career.
Heather’s fourth Davidson sport was golf. In this case, her performance was less about her ability, and more about her willingness to help alma mater. After basketball was cut, the college learned that another team’s season record would be invalidated. The NCAA gave Davidson the choice of being placed on probation for a Title IX violation for the 1986-87 season or field an intercollegiate team that could compete before the end of the 1985-86 academic year. The solution was a one-time Davidson Women’s Golf Team. She was not a great golfer, but she and four teammates (including future spouse Jane) kept their alma mater from being placed on probation. She received a wool letter sweater for her efforts, a sweater that bears Davidson’s “new again” interlocking D and C.
Following graduation from Davidson, Heather received a second undergraduate degree from Queens University in 1989, this one in accounting. She balanced the academic challenge of a second degree, while serving as an assistant basketball coach at Country Day. Following a brief stint as a CPA in Charlotte, she felt a calling to ministry.
Jane and Heather wearing their 35+ year old golf letter sweaters.
Davidson College Presbyterian Church sponsored her call, and she earned a Master of Divinity from Princeton Theological Seminary. She did not become ordained upon graduation due to the stance that the PCUSA then held that did not permit the ordination of members of the LGBTQ community.
It was during her time at Princeton that her birth mother hired a private detective to find her. And one day, she received a letter in her mailbox making the unusual introduction. While she had known since childhood that she was adopted, she could have never imagined that while pursuing her M. Div. she would discover that her birth-maternal grandfather, great and great-great grandfathers were ordained ministers. In fact, her grandfather whom she later met, served as an ordained Presbyterian minister for 56 years.
Her first job out of seminary was as director of the Bonner Scholars program at Mars Hill. After that, she held numerous leadership positions in the fields of healthcare policy, ethics, and administration. That career in healthcare began as an instructor in medical ethics at The Medical College of Wisconsin, teaching first-year medical students.
During her time in Madison, some of the research she co-authored gained national attention in academic circles. Most notably, it caught the attention of Harvard Medical School. She was hired subsequently as their project manager for the Department of Health Care Policy and served in that capacity for a number of years. Some of her work later became the basis of the Affordable Care Act.
She left Harvard when her father was diagnosed with cancer. Her mother had passed away several years prior, and Heather became a full-time care provider for her father. It was a role that would give her keen insights when her own diagnosis was made.
Heather participating in a Sunday morning service at Davidson College Presbyterian Church.
After he passed away, she took his comments about regretting not traveling more as a benediction of sorts. Shortly thereafter, she embarked on her “midlife year abroad.” In Heather fashion, she took a backpack trip around the world. And if she ever talked to you about that trip, she likely spent some time telling you about either her longer-than-planned stay on the island of Western Samoa, the cooking classes she took in Thailand, or the boat ride she took up the Mekong River in Vietnam. She was an adventurer at heart.
When she returned from that adventure she decided to “leave the ivory tower” of academics and put her skills and leadership abilities to work. In 2009, she was hired as Executive Director of The Sublette Center, a nonprofit senior health and housing organization in Pinedale, Wyoming and served in that capacity until 2013. During her tenure, she righted the financials of the organization, taking the center from near-bankruptcy to starting a major capital expansion project.
In 2012, she and Jane reconnected at their 25th Davidson Reunion. As the class agent, Jane had called Heather for money in advance of the reunion, and then asked if Heather planned on coming to Davidson all the way from Wyoming. She did, and the rest is history.
Their wedding photo from the shore of Pokai Bay on Oahu.
Their first official date took place about a month later when Jane asked Heather to come visit The Pentagon to attend the first ever Pride Ceremony. After dating long distance, the couple wed in a private ceremony on a beach at Pokai Bay, Hawaii – just days after the state legalized same-sex marriage in December 2013. The timing was such that two days after their wedding, Jane and Heather attended the 72nd December 7th Anniversary Commemoration Ceremony at Pearl Harbor. It would be the first of a number of the couple’s visits to Hawaii.
Heather and Jane moved back to Davidson in late 2014 and began volunteering across the community. She volunteered to serve as an assistant Field Hockey coach for the Wildcats 2015 season. It was their first season in the A-10, and under Heather’s coaching they made it to the A-10 tournament.
It was also shortly after their return to Davidson that they joined in the discussions at DCPC as the church was considering allowing same-sex weddings. And toward the latter part of those discussions, they asked if they could have a service of blessing if the policy were to be changed. The policy did change, with anonymous votes by the Session of 24-1 to change the church’s policy and 25-0 to approve Heather and Jane’s ceremony.
The big Davidson College group photo following their service at DCPC.
On July 4, 2015, they had their big “church wedding” with family and friends. Presiding at the service was the Rev. Dr. John W. Kuykendall and Rev. Lib McGregor Simmons. Following the service, the bells chimed in joy and could be heard across campus and town. Guests were then treated to a North Carolina BBQ and ice cream in the Lilly Family Gallery.
In 2017, Heather and Jane traveled back to Hawaii for Christmas. In addition to the holidays, the timing of their trip also coincided with the Davidson men’s basketball team’s participation in the Diamond Head Classic. Heather’s siblings and their families joined them for the trip. The highlight of the trip for Heather was the once-in-a-lifetime meeting of a special former President. The story of meeting former President Barack Obama on the beach at Bellows Air Force Station is made only better by the fact that the unexpected chance meeting happened when Heather was only wearing a Steph Curry Davidson 30 t-shirt and her bathing suit. Hopefully, you had the chance to hear her tell that story.
That day she met former President Obama at Bellow Air Force Station in Hawaii.
Heather was also recruited to be a teacher at DCPC, stepping into the daunting role of teaching the Maloney Class – named for Rev. Dr. Sam Maloney. One of the challenges with the class is that there are often more ordained clergy in the class than lay people. Heather’s classes always reflected the immense effort she put into the preparation. She taught graduate-level material, but she was able to explain it to folks in a way that was truly understandable. In short, her teaching skills were masterful.
Notably, Heather also served initially as a Deacon and subsequently as an Elder at DCPC. Her vows of ordination took on a greater meaning that few could fully understand in light of her inability to be ordained out of Seminary. She took on the role of deacon and elder with a desire to bring her knowledge of, not only theology, but also of Presbyterian polity to her colleagues on the Session and Deaconate.
Members of the presbytery group following a presentation for a local congregation.
At one point, she was chairing no fewer than three church committees. Of all her work as an ordained elder, it was her labor to create the DCPC Social Justice Committee that gave her the most joy. That work put her on the radar of the presbytery and beyond, and she subsequently served on the Charlotte Presbytery’s LGBTQ Ministry Team and worked with the national Covenant Network.
Somehow, Heather also made time for serving as the National Treasurer for the American Society of Overseas Research (ASOR), a volunteer assignment she undertook at the request of a Davidson classmate. Founded in 1900, ASOR’s mission is to “initiate, encourage, and support research into, and public understanding of, the history and cultures of the Near East and wider Mediterranean, from the earliest times.” She was honored with the ASOR Membership Service Award in 2021.
When she presented the financial report at the November 2019 ASOR national convention, she received numerous compliments for her ability to weave an in depth understanding of the nature of ASOR’s work with the very detailed aspect of the financial side of the ledger.
In November 2020, in the midst of the COVID pandemic, Heather stepped out of retirement and accepted the call to take on the role as Interim CEO of The Pines at Davidson. During her tenure she focused on maintaining the health and safety policies, procedures, and guidelines that protected The Pines from the spread of COVID-19 on its campus and on supporting and leading the staff in delivering high quality services; interacting with residents, families, and staff; and helping to assure the successful completion of the campus expansion. In late 2024, The Pines let her know that the Gazebo on Kimbrough Court would be named in her honor for her invaluable contributions to the residents and staff. (Go here to read about Heather’s work at The Pines.)
Heather and Jane in front of the Ranger Cabin at the Montreat Family Campground.
Following her work at The Pines and in the aftermath of COVID, Heather and Jane embarked on a new assignment – that of Montreat Campground Rangers/Hosts. And for the next two summers, they spent weeks at a time at the campground – enjoying mother nature and helping campers in the process.
In July 2023, shortly after what they thought would be their first “shift” in Montreat, Heather received the daunting diagnosis of Stage IV esophageal/gastric cancer. She never wanted anyone to refer to this stage of her life as a “battle” with the disease, but rather a journey with it. If cancer were something that she could set her mind to and defeat, it never would have stood a chance against Heather. She noted that in the discussion between Martina Navratilova and Chris Evert they talked about not being able to “rehab” their way out of cancer.
Within 10 days of the Stage IV diagnosis, she started an aggressive chemotherapy program, and that was after visits to Mayo in Jacksonville and the Duke Cancer Institute. The esophageal cancer team at Duke was remarkable. Their comprehensive approach to care resonated with her. Moreover, their willingness to work with the local oncology team at the Novant Cancer Institute in Mooresville meant that a world-class expert could direct her care, and she could receive treatments 15 minutes away from home.
One of the particular cruelties of the disease was the impact it had on her ability to eat. As anyone who got to taste one of Heather’s culinary creations would know, she was a masterful chef. The origin of her interest in cooking is a story that could be only a Heather experience. When she wanted to move out of the dorm at PTS, she wound up living with former Ambassador and Mrs. George F. Kenan. Often called upon to prepare meals for the couple, she learned quickly how to use Escoffier as a guide and an inspiration in the kitchen. Her love of cooking only grew and flourished over the years.
Heather noting her arrival in her 50th state – Anchorage, Alaska.
Despite the challenges of the journey with an incurable disease, she and Jane managed to carve out some special times that included travel. In May 2024, they embarked on a planes, trains, and automobile tour of Alaska. It was Heather’s 50th state to visit, and the team of medical professionals providing her care agreed that she was okay to travel. So, she took a short break from chemo to make it happen.
Then in July, they traveled to Las Vegas to watch nephew Jackson play in an AAU tournament. This was made all the more special because Jackson lives in Australia. Heather’s brother, Matt McKee, made the trip. Heather’s sister Piper McKee Warner, traveled from Charlotte as well – so the three siblings could be together.
The three McKee siblings at Hoover Dam during the trip to Las Vegas.
Heather is survived by her spouse, Jane Campbell; brother Matt McKee (Joanna Buddee), nephew Jackson, and niece Sofia of Perth, Australia; sister Piper McKee Warner (Mark) and niece Margaret of Charlotte, North Carolina; sisters-in-law Ann Campbell Cripps of Davidson and Lee Campbell Hansen (Butch) of Pensacola, Florida. She was predeceased by her parents Reuel and Joan McKee.
Jane and all of Heather’s family would like to express their profound gratitude for the amazing medical professionals at the Novant Cancer Institute Infusion Center in Mooresville – especially the wonderful nursing team. They are also grateful for the esophageal cancer and radiation oncology teams at the Duke Cancer Institute. They also wish to thank the caring professions of Iredell Hospice and Palliative Care.
Heather’s Public Service Announcement: Esophageal/Gastric Cancer is the fastest growing Stage IV cancer being diagnosed. She often noted that there hasn’t been a Katie Curic for the disease, and too many people with recurring acid reflux/Gerd don’t know the extent of the danger. Get an endoscopy if you have any questions. Don’t wait for an incurable diagnosis.
And yes, I told Stephen Curry that Heather had held a Wildcat scoring record longer than his – Jane C.